Random Thoughts For A Random Playlist

Fun idea! Hit the random button on a playlist and write about what songs pop up! Toots fun!

Song 1: Just a Girl - No Doubt

I'm trying to remember the first time I listened to this band. The exact time escapes me, but they were the one band that I listened to with a female singer at once point. I vaguely remember their Spiderwebs video, and it was their Don't Speak song that ended up playing some mornings while I was getting ready for high school.

The big part of me listening to my own kind of music happened after the big Divorce in the family. I used to get ready for school in my aunt's house we were staying at temporarily, while I took the city bus across town in order to stay at the high school on the west side of town that I was attending. We technically lived in the Bloomington side of town, and I should have transferred to District 87, but it was notorious for being the "bad" district. Is seeing the friends and people that I met later in life who went to that school, I very much could have found friends there and made it. Not sure what was so "bad" about it.

Song 2: Bulls on Parade - Rage Against the Machine

Now this was one I remember listening to at my cousin's house when I was 15. I remember the album, and I think I owned it at one point. I vaguely recall seeing the music video for this one, but I clearly remember the album cover for this one and for the self-titled album. I believe my cousin was the one who listened to them and got me hooked on them. I spent some time with him when I was 15 and he was 16. We traveled the town of Crestwood Missouri with his friends, singing songs like this one and Smashing Pumpkins.

At the time, I had a Dennis Rodman shirt that was his book cover when he was sitting naked on top of a motorcycle. I wore it one day while down there with his friends and they all pointed and didn't know what to say. Looking back, I was probably embarrassed, but I was the only one with balls to do it. The incident happened at a mall that is now dead, like most malls are these days.

I was a rebel, and Rage helped me with that small aspect.

Song 3: Inside Out by Eve 6

This is another song that I can't pinpoint when it came in to my life, but I remember it being the song that me and my friends listened to in the latter days of high school.

This might have been the first song that I learned all the words to from a band I didn't know by listening to it. That may sound weird for me to be almost 18 and appreciating music like that, but I didn't realize the poetry in the words of most bands. Admit tingly, I thought that all bands sort of screeched or made weird noises and would sing a chorus every now and then. I chalk that up to me not taking the time to listen to the music and appreciate the poetry. It is very different these days.

This might be a song I need to sing during some karaoke event, if that ever happens again in my life. I am tone deaf, and me trying to sing really flaunts this fact.

Song 4: This Is A Call - Foo Fighters

For the longest time I was all blah towards Foo Fighters. To me, they seemed like a pop version of Nirvana. What can I say, I damned Grohl for starting his own band after Nirvana. I've change my tune a bit in recent years, as I think they are actually more rock than most rock bands these days. I like to play them when I need something that just rocks that I haven't heard too much. They aren't too deep on the poetry level for me and they just play their fucking instruments.

Even now, I find it hard to type while listening to the music because I just want to go all Animal on a drum set. Instead, I'll post this and then just slam my hands in to the bed. I'll be careful of the one hand, it is still slightly damaged.

The Healing Time

Typing has been something of a hassle lately, what with the arm in a brace. I can still type at an OK pace, but I have to correct myself a lot as well as use only my left thumb for the space bar. Using a mouse is next to impossible, and a track pad isn't the best to work with at times.

I'M sure I'll be writing a lot more soon. First I want to get my hand strength up so I can type without pain. That's what happens when you friend runs over your arm with their jeep. So trust me, there is a story in this.

Like there should be.

Trying All The Oreos

I've got a sweet tooth hankering right now. To help either fuel or disperse that feeling, let's talk about the many flavors of Oreos that I've had throughout the year.

Much like Cheez-its, which I will definitely write about some day, I used to bring the various varieties of Oreos that would come out and share them with co-workers so we could all give them a taste. I got a list pulled up next to me that goes back to 2012, so away I go.

Candy Corn - This was one of the first that I brought in to work to see how the experiment would go. Sure enough, they tasted really bland, just like candy corn. If memory serves me right, they lasted a couple of days on the shelf next to me, so that is telling that they weren't very good at all. 4/10

Gingerbread - A step up! Gingerbread was also on the vanilla Oreo cookie, and it had a cinnamon blast to it that was much appreciated by all who had it. 7/10

Rainbow ShureBert - Not sure what was going on with the name, but this Oreo was also on the vanilla cookie and had a bit of the candy corn flavoring to it, meaning that it tasted a little waxy. There was a definite improvement form the formula that was used for candy corn, and having some of the lime taste in there was a great balance. 6/10

Halloween - Not really a flavor variety, but I did bring it in to work. A regular Oreo with your creme dyed orange with a decorative Halloween themed shape on one side of the cookie. These were popular, but I think more so because they were just a regular Oreo and that was a good palate cleanser from all the variety ones. 9/10 - only because it is standard with no special gimmicks, and this is about gimmicks!

Birthday Cake - Now this one was a definite winner. Oreo made them on both the chocolate and vanilla cookie, and there were at times tense debates in the office about which was better. For my money, I liked the vanilla cookie better, only because the mix with the chocolate cookie seemed to cut at some of the taste of the filling. You'll find that for the most part, unless you need a chocolate balance, some of the better varieties were on the vanilla cookie so you could taste the special cream flavoring. Chocolate - 7/10 Vanilla - 9/10

Watermelon - You would think this would be similar to the sherbert one, but having just watermelon made it taste like you were dunking a vanilla cookie Oreo in to a glass of Hi-C. Really sweet, and really missed the target for what it could have been. 3/10

Strawberries n Creme - This was a variety for the chocolate cookie. It had a good blend of the strawberry and creme flavor to it. I'd be half tempted to see if they could make a strawberry cookie to go with this one, but then you would miss out on the chocolate taste that reminds you of a half and half shake from Steak n Shake. 7/10

Caramel Apple - Now this one was on the weird side. This was made on a vanilla cookie, and tried to mix a caramel and apple flavoring that just wasn't a good mix. It could have been because I wasn't a fan of caramel apples, but I do remember this one sitting around on the desk for a long time after it was opened. 3/10

Limeade - Now this was a good Oreo. Solid choice. For a long time I had a desire to take this one, mix it with the lemon Oreo, and have one mega Sprite flavored Oreo. My boss was living in Boston when this was out, and so she specifically brought over a box on a trip to the office and left it at my desk. Taking that first bite of the Sprite flavor...magical. It was everything I was hoping for, a lemon/lime mix that held up so well. But if I am looking at grading just on the lime itself, it would still be solid. 8/10

Root Beer Float - I don't recall this one. I think I picked it up, but I might have missed it. If that is the case, then the flavoring obviously didn't hit and it was easily forgettable. ?/10

Fruit Punch - Apparently Oreo did not learn anything from the watermelon, as this seemed to try and repeat the old recipe of that one. Not a fan, and glad it went away. 2/10

Pumpkin Spice - Calling all you basic bitches! Just joking (maybe). This was a standard flavoring not really doing anything too daring. It was on the vanilla cookie, and was just forgettable to me, but appreciated by all the pumpkin spice loving people around the office. 6/10

Reese's Peanut Butter Cup - Now this was a good combination with the chocolate cookie. I've seen this back at the store often enough that I think it might be a regular flavor that they put out like the lemon. Imagine taking a bite of a Reese's with an extra layer of chocolate covering it. The flavoring was that spot on. 9/10

Marshmallow Crispy - Rice Krispies in the cream of an Oreo on their vanilla cookie. This was magical. It was so good, I seriously wanted them to put out a frosting for cakes with this. In fact, if I ever see that they put out an Oreo frosting, I'm buying a box of Rice Krispies with it to make this frosting. I've been a fan of Crispy M&Ms for years, even going to the extent of a having a friend buy a package from oversees to bring it here to the states when they weren't available. I imagine Oreo wanted to call it Rice Kripie Oreos, buy a licensing deal must have fallen out. Too bad, because I would definitely have diabetes if this was a flavor available all year round. 10/10

Cookie Dough - Blegh. This came out on the chocolate cookie the same time as the Marshmallow one. Was there a competition between these two or something? I don't know, but the winner in our office was clear, as this one was just left on the desk for days in the office. Being a fan of cookie dough, I wondered how Oreo was going to translate that taste. They didn't, as it tasted more like bad coffee than anything resembling cookie dough. Would it be better on the vanilla cookie? Probably not. 1/10

Red Velvet - a chocolate flavoring on a chocolate Oreo. Nothing really special here, except the price of the packaging effectively went up as this came in a package that was about 2/3rds of the size of a regular package of Oreos, but cost just as much. Very blah all around on this one, but there were some in the office who appreciated it. Since I was buying, I stopped after the two packages were gone in a week. 5/10

S'mores - There was a bad marketing decision, as this should have easily been called S'mOreos. The cookie changed on this one to a graham cracker cookie instead of your usual vanilla or chocolate. The move was a smart one, as going in any other direction might have made this cookie go south. This was a solid one, and one that I backed up and shelled the extra cash to have a few extras in at the office. 8/10

Toasted Coconut - This one I don't remember much. I remember having a coconut flavor, but there wasn't much said about it around the office outside of "I don't like coconut." Maybe you have to be a fan, but this one was just thrown out there and kinda worked. 6/10

Key Lime Pie - Back to the graham cracker cookie, and it was a good choice. I don't think I have ever had key lime pie, but this was essentially the limeade Oreo on the graham cracker cookie. It was a good choice, solid cookie, and was popular with co-workers who had key lime pie before. Solid. 8/10

And this is where the journey ends. This was the point when I moved to Austin. If I wanted Oreos, I would have to buy the whole package for myself. I did with the cinnamon buns Oreos, as well as the fudge filled Oreos, and the cake batter Oreos. None matched the way that the Marshmallow ones did, and they didn't do as bad as the Fruit Punch ones. Effective flavors.

I'm thinking of maybe getting back in to the routine of bringing in the variety in to work for everyone to try at my new job, but this can get a little pricey if I try to consistently leave a package going in there. I think I'll stay away from it for now, but I'm hoping that changes someday soon.

The Board Games I Will Kick Your Ass At

There are two board games that you will lose to me if we play. Hands down, no exceptions. They are two of the most hated board games that people play.

Risk and Monopoly.

Let's start with Monopoly. My family played that almost religiously. Thanks to my mom's side of the family, this got passed down to me and my siblings. It is to the point that we were cut throat in getting certain properties, made impossible trade deals to get them, and almost always had our own strategy that would work to win.

With this, I was able to tell you immediately where you piece was after a roll of the dice no matter where you were on the board. This muscle has grown a little weak in recent years, but give me a game or two to get it back. There was even a point that we all knew the mortgage rate for properties, the rent rates, and the cost of houses/hotels.

We were serious when it came to playing games as children. You know how some families take many hours/days to play a single game? We had that shit on clock work. Away we went and had games done in under an hour at times. Competitive, we most definitely were.

Moving over to Risk, that was the second game we really got in to as we got older. Monopoly was the kid's game, Risk was the next step. Again, we conquered the board and lands of Risk in under an hour as well. We were all fast paced enough to want to get the shit done.

We knew the lands that touched each other, we knew exactly the strategies that would win you certain continents, and we always broke up each other's continents if they held it too long.

Fast forward to next weekend, were my family is gathering for the next year of our family Risk tournament. We typically have about 10-18 people show up, roll some dice, and try to conquer all 42 countries. First round divides us all up so that there are about 5-6 players for the final table, or the second round. Most families would take a few days just for the first round, but we have it done in under a couple of hours, if that. I have been proud to host once and have won twice, even breaking the streak that we had going where the host typically won the tournament.

How crazy do we get in to this tournament? There are small trophies of some kind for the first person out at each table. We have a Whale prize for the person who defends the most times in a single battle with only one soldier still left standing in their country. We have a pitchfork that gets passed around for the player who rolls 6-6-6 roll on attacks that they get to keep at the end of it. There is even the championship belt that I made from one of those WWE championship belts. I did a couple of conversions to make it say Risk Tournament Champion, and it gets passed from the previous year's winner to the new winner each year. My uncle even designs a t-shirt for us each year that he brings, as well as a special champion's tshirt.

So we get a little crazy. If you knew the family, you would understand.

There are also various card games we grew up playing, and many other board games, but those were the big two. Coming from big families, you find ways to pass the time with what you have, and as long as you have a deck of cards or a closet of board games, you were bound to kick some one's ass.

Been Gone Longer Than I Wanted

I've been neglecting this for far longer than I wanted.

Mixture of keeping busy and having events come up made the days of being on here very slim. I also slipped in to somewhat of a depressed state, so I'm taking that as a sign that I need to keep up with this for mental sanity.

I've come in to a bit of a financial type of situation. I always knew with my current expenditures and cut in salary that I would begin to need to make up for the difference somehow, and that time appears to be now. Back in to the ebay business I go, this time to finally clear out the remaining comics that I have, and possibly to start on the video games.

Part of me is thinking that the big bonus we are expecting this year at work around the holidays will prove to help fund the remaining debt on my last student loan, and then I can work on the monthly business of the credit cards. I just had the taste of being out of debt, but here I went spending money to help me feel like I could find myself in Austin by spending money. Not the smartest part of me, but soon I hope to have a couple of expenses cut down so that I can tackle that debt demon and put it out of its misery.

I'm posed with the possibility of also getting a second job, which may end up proving fruitful as a door guy at a bar. It wouldn't pay much, I'm sure, but it would be something to help me out. Again, at the point that needing that something to do for the money would help with balancing out the main bills until I can pay everything off. Sigh. It really is this financial stuff that can bring me down. I loved the days of knowing that I could go a little crazy from time to time and still bounce back from it. Now I don't have that safety net, and it is causing me stress. Points to anyone who finds that the leading cause of stress in life can be financial difficulties.

I've also found that I find myself hanging around a lot of couples. Good for them, but it is starting to get to me at times. I am happy, I see them happy, and I want to share this happiness with someone else. But then I look at my finances and am thankful that I don't have that going on, as that would be added expenses and stress that I don't need. I've been down that path in life and it took me years to get out of it, I don't need it again.

I also didn't get much reading done either this past week, much to the dismay of the stack of books next to my bed. I've been tackling more online videos on YouTube and Hulu. I'm about to cancel the Hulu account simply because I can't afford it anymore, and I have enough stuff to watch between YouTube, Netflix, and Amazon Prime. One blog post sometime will be about that and how I've approached and liked the different services, but not for now.

And with this, I transition to the ebay tab on my computer screen. Time to put up some auctions and get the ball rolling on liquidating the last four long boxes I have.

If People Won't Move Out Of My Way, Then Leave Them In The Dust

I'm torn some nights between reading a shit ton of books, or sitting down and writing. I put some music on while I write, so I'm going that route for now. If only there was more time at night to do this.

The scattering of my thoughts on the keyboard is interesting to observe from outside of me. I didn't realize it until today, but I didn't check out the scene around me that much at the coffee shop. I was lost in my own world, and was busy focusing on what I was writing. My usual thoughts when I walk in to a room is to notice an escape route, and then check out the people there. There is a game that goes in to my head where I assign roles to people based on how they look and decide what would happen if an emergency went down. I calculate how people would react and try as I can to imagine who I would want to get stuck with in that situation.

There are certain rooms and spaces where this doesn't do well. Take an elevator. The personal preference is to not use one, but sometimes the situation calls for it. Say after a meeting at work where we all jump in for the magical ride up four stories. Cramming many people in to that tiny box is almost preferable to slowly going up the stairs behind someone who is taking their fucking time.

When I walk, I walk through, around, and pass people. While walking. Do I just have that fast of a pace? Navigating through the crowd comes weirdly natural to me, almost as if those years of playing video games to find the quickest path melted in to my visual senses when navigating through people. Add to it years of serving and navigating not only around guests but also fellow servers. Several times it was observed that I was serving like a ghost, popping up from time to time and scaring some people while always taking care of the table. I always felt that as a server, the meal was the star of the show and not me.

Cultivate. I want to use that word in a sentence, but I'm not sure how to entangle it in one just yet. Cultivate knowledge?

I'm distracting myself by thinking about what book I am going to be reading soon. If my thoughts are going there, then it is time to end this for the day.

Back In The Summer Camp of '94

Sitting in a coffee shop called Monkey Nest while sipping on Earl Grey and judging everyone around me. I'm sure I am being judged as well, considering how sweaty I am from walking here.

I was surprised after walking outside that it was as humid as it is today. I haven't really felt something like this since Illinois, so it has a odd sense of memories trickling in and walks from years ago.

I walk these days more out of enjoyment and exploration of the city, but it wasn't always that way. Traveling around as a child meant getting some miles in. I used to walk quite a distance to school, as well as bike on other days. I need to check on Google maps sometime, but I think the distance turns out to be about 3 miles in one direction, which meant that if I missed the bus I had a ton of walking to do. It used to be just me, by myself around age 7 or 8. When my brothers and sister were able to join me, it would be the four of us all walking in a line on the way there. I don't know if that is how I picked up my fast pace while walking, but I like to think that it was.

We used to walk 4 miles round trip to summer camp one summer, my siblings and I. We had out day planned out during that summer. We would wake up, hang around the house eating breakfast then lunch. We would watch back to back episodes of American Gladiators on the USA network. After that, we walked over to our elementary school where camp took place. Camp was from noon until five, and I forget if my parents would pick us up or if we would walk back.

Camp was great, as it was a mix of kids from the local schools all getting together, divided by age groups. I was in my own since I was the oldest in the family. My counselor was Steve, and we used to joke about him and the next grade level counselor getting together. I remember her beaming about it one day, but I don't think anything became of it. If it did, I didn't notice. That was the summer I met Clare, the first girl who got me to do those nervous, teenage boy giggles. I think our being together lasted something like 3 days. I remember we went to an ice cream shop, the whole group from camp, and I had some delicious sherbet ice cream. I forget the name of the shop, but I did win a free ice cream cone from it for doing something.

My big thing about camp that summer was that the Lion King was coming out or had come out. I protested it, because I felt Disney was releasing too many movies at the time and that they should stop. The radio blasted Elton John's Can You Feel The Love Tonight and I didn't like it on principle. At the end of camp, there was a special prize drawing. There was a Lion King soundtrack. The counselor drew the winning ticket with the lucky camp goer's name on it, and she smiled big and wide as she said my name. I felt everyone look at me and I know I had a look of horror on my face.

Wait a minute, that's how I got the free ice cream! I ended up trading someone else, some girl who was heads over tails for the movie, her free ice cream cone for the soundtrack. I never redeemed that ice cream cone ticket, so I think I won in the trade at the end of the day.

For years after moving to Normal I would pine over that summer, over my friends back in Belleville. Sixth grade was fun, seventh started out just as interesting, and the move to BloNo hit me like a truck. I didn't recover for a while after that.

That was my life over 20 years ago. I grew sick of moving after that, or I had done it enough that I built up a tolerance for it. Bouncing around from home to home and from school to school was just the routine, expected, unsurprising. Maybe that is why I am OK with people floating in and out of my life so much, it just becomes expected. I like to think that it means I know the routine in how to make friends and people. Maybe that who time growing up like that prepared me for the big move to Austin. Or maybe it is training for something later in life. The mind wonders, and possibilities are pondered.